In Michigan I found this beautiful frilly pink dress. It's foofy and lacy and has puffed sleeves, and looks like it was made for a five-year-old and then scaled up with room for a bosom. I love it. I pranced around the store for a good fifteen minutes, trying on shoes and wasting time because I didn't want to get out of the pretty dress. I love looking like a girl.

But I wear jeans all the time. I don't mind jeans, there's nothing wrong with them. But I have lots of gorgeous skirts and dresses. I wear jeans all the time because to dress like a girl is to attract notice, and I don't want to attract notice.

Tomorrow I am going to dress like a girl. I will be uncomfortable, because even if people aren't looking at me, I'll feel like people are looking at me. I will feel weird. And I will make myself do this every day until either I get acclimated or I don't secretly want to do it anymore, as uncomfortable as it sometimes makes me.

I am also going to learn to do my hair! Because given the price of my dye jobs, putting it in a ponytail just doesn't cut it!