I splurged and bought a Photoplay from November 1926 that I found in a soon-to-be-closed antique and collectibles store. I love reading the articles and ads, and there was a perfume ad for a company called "Cheramy New York: Perfumes of Youth." They must have spent a pretty penny on the ad, as almost the whole magazine is in black-and-white except for the occasional ad pages in color (the other side of the color page is Palmolive soap). The best part is the breathless prose:

The Last Ecstatic Moment with Lovely April Showers

When you have on a good-looking new frock. when you know that coiffure, make-up, and every detail is just right; when instinct tells you that admiring glances will follow as you pass; then approve the finishing touches before a long mirror and add assurance with springlike April Showers!

For April Showers, the perfume of youth, will lift imagination to heights of ecstacy -- give you joyful thrill of life and youth and conscious power .... It is a breezy fragrance; friendly -- eager -- young! You will love the rare, capricious charm of April Showers in perfumes, powders, rouges, jewel-like little compacts, and other necessary toiletries.

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Holy crap, where has this been all my life? I want heights of ecstasy! I need a joyful thrill of life AND youth AND conscious power. I don't even know what exactly that means, but I need it! I too want to be friendly, eager and young -- not surly, tired and old like I am now.

That does it -- I'm going to spray assurance on me and everyone else around, whether they want it sprayed on them or not. Oh, and I'm going to start saying "rouge" too.