Freikugel

I'm having a hard time sleeping tonight, so I'll write a melodramatic (but not untrue) review of a frimp I received years ago. Straight out of the little vial, it was, and still is, my one true scent enemy, the Adversary of my BPAL collection: Bayou. Once my nemesis makes contact with my skin, it becomes an inescapable aberration not unlike the Hounds of Tindalos from the Cthulhu mythos. I still have a hard time wrapping my head around how impossibly bad this perfume smells on me. It lost none of its power after all this time. It's difficult to describe it even after reading the listed notes. Salty, swampy, maybe even moldy, like a generic men's body wash left in a forgotten corner of a condemned gym. Which among the individual elements could be the culprit? I have very bad luck with foresty or herbal perfumes like Burial, Baba Yaga, Crossroads, Black Forest, and Yggdrasil, so maybe it's the cypress or evergreen. I suspect the Spanish moss may be involved as well, but I have no basis for that belief- I'm just dubious of it because I associate it with Bayou. Not sure what "swamp blooms" smell like, but if the note is similar to what's in Machu Picchu, it's probably not that. Unless jasmine is involved, in which case it almost certainly is. This perfume also does not wash off even after vigorous scrubbing. It fades when it feels like it after a minimum of six hours. The only other scents from BPAL that come close to Bayou's staying power, for me, are 51 and Snake Oil. I don't hate aquatics outright - I really like Sea of Glass and Lightning, and while Lyonesse is salty, buttery, and overall confusing on me, it isn't terrible. This is an altogether different beast! It could be that this scent just happens to be the perfect storm of my personal death notes all combined into one. I keep the imp of Bayou around to glance at nervously when I'm deciding on new imps or bottles to buy. It acts as a cross-reference red flag for any concoction sharing similar notes. As a cautionary tale... [insert thunderclap SFX]

Frimp. I was extremely suspicious when I read the notes - excepting the orange blossom, it's all scents I think I don't wear well (a tree note, clove), one I don't often like (mint), and a wildcard - cumin. It sounded borderline Christmas-y considering I like orange pomanders with cloves and fir wreaths around that holiday. On applying it, I found it much less imposing than the notes suggested, and it's not a scent I'll have to confine to December! A very unique orange blossom scent, gender neutral with surprising throw on my skin. My guess is that the basalm, fir, cumin, and clove balance each other nicely. Maybe the basalm makes the clove and cumin smell less like food but still like themselves. The mint adds freshness and probably also harmonizes with the menthol-ish clove and fir. Black musk anchors it and tobacco adds sweetness. It fades gracefully over a few hours without morphing much, so I'd put the lasting power at three out of five stars. Overall, I enjoy this and might even spring for a bottle someday if I find it ages well.

Frimp. Wet, I'm definitely getting the volcanic gas! It's a chemical, chalky-synthetic smell accentuated by green notes and a floral note I can't identify. I'm not totally sure what black musk smells like, but something must be tying the other scents together. The gas note fades in and out over time and it soon starts to smell more like a fancy soap. Not a bad soap. It's just something I'd expect to smell in a nice restaurant bathroom. There is no throw except about two inches from my wrist. Not something I'd buy, but it was cool to try it.

Frimp. In the bottle, it didn't have much of a smell to me. Wet, it smelled like a fancy, light soap, something I'd like to wash my hands with. Flowers in rain, but extremely fleeting - within minutes, it was undetectable unless I put my nose next to my wrist, and even then it's an extremely light scent. I never smelled amber. About two months later, I initially smelled something that reminded me of Lightning, but then it was gone. If I'm huffing it, I think I can pick up a fruity scent, but only because I know it's supposed to be a note. Not picking up on any florals anymore, but I might smell a suggestion of amber. Either way, then and now, my skin eats this incredibly fast. It's not bad, but it's gone so quickly that it feels like it was never there to begin with!

Frimp! I also got almond from this initially, both in the bottle and on my skin. It quickly moved to a rose-heavy smell on my wrist and got downright musty applied to my inner arm. Seeing as I I tend to amp rose notes and don't like rose much in the first place, I probably won't use this again.

Snake Oil mixed in sweetened condensed milk, full stop. All warmed, caramelized edges. Smells the same in the bottle, wet, and dry, lightening up slowly and beautifully. Sticks closer to the skin than other varieties of SO I've tried, so I'm not sure if the sillage is as potent as it normally is for me and SO. I usually prefer other people to be able to smell me if I'm wearing something nice, but if they can't detect this on me, it's their loss! Rich but not cloying or headache-inducing. I wouldn't call this foodie, but it makes me want a warm Vietnamese coffee real bad. Layering it could be fun if coffee notes work for you!

There must be something wrong with my nose, because the only thing that comes to mind when I smell it - wet in the imp or on my skin, after it dries, anything- is margarita mix. Salty, chemical lime. I don't get flowers, let alone coconut meat, which is part of why I ordered it. I wanted something light and sweet. For me, Shoggoth was neither. EDIT: Forgot to mention that I thought it was funny that Shoggoth smelled horrifying on me, considering the subject matter.