doomsday_disco

O, who rides by night thro’ the woodland so wild? It is the fond father embracing his child; And close the boy nestles within his loved arm, To hold himself fast, and to keep himself warm. The pale sugared blossoms of innocence wrapped tightly in sleet-soaked arms. Vanilla bourbon, cream peony, and white carnation enveloped in a warm, protective fortress of tonka, white cedar, orris root, red amber, and leather.

Now this is the Law of the Jungle — as old and as true as the sky; And the Wolf that shall keep it may prosper, but the Wolf that shall break it must die. As the creeper that girdles the tree-trunk the Law runneth forward and back — For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack. – Rudyard Kipling A scent for strength through solidarity against the encroaching horrors of authoritarianism. Silvered fir, life-giving soil and immovable stone, black sage, rue, hellebore accord, winter moss, cypress, fossilized amber resin, and vetiver. May the thundering chorus of our voices — entwined, rising, unbreakable — scatter the darkness.

This strongly reminds me of Cathédrale Notre-Dame de Paris (Lilith meets the Gargoyles of Paris: stone and ancient incense, beeswax and lavender smoke). I believe this hair gloss features the same incense and stone notes, although I'm not really getting any beeswax from the scent in my hair. The hair gloss has great longevity. Most hair glosses disappear not long after I apply it to wet hair, but I was still able to smell this one when I held my hair up to my nose by the end of the day. In dry hair, it was more noticeable and had even better longevity, but this isn't one of those hair glosses that hits you with a cloud of scent when you go to wash your hair, and it's not one that will linger after a wash. I'll definitely be hanging on to my decant of this, but I don't think I'd reach for it enough to warrant a full bottle -- mainly because I don't have a ton of church-y or resinous scents in my collection to pair it with. But if you enjoyed Cathédrale Notre-Dame de Paris, you should enjoy this, too.

A frost-edged nave of stone, where stained glass glimmers with the light from prayer-lofted votives. Spirals of incense drift through the chill winter air, mingling with the solemn drip of beeswax from altar candles. Cedar pews gleam under centuries of prayer, and the air hums with hushed devotion.

After thirty years of reluctantly drinking coffee, Ted has become a bean aficionado thanks to a local shop called the Head Nut. Recently, we bought French vanilla and bourbon chocolate beans from them and ever since that day, Ted has been hooked. Of course, Ted’s morning coffee is the breakfast beverage equivalent to a cozy hug: a slow-simmered swirl of brown sugar melting into steamed milk, wrapped around the soothing, sweet warmth of vanilla-infused espresso.

A festive and urgently mammalian response to inclement weather: a pair of blushing musks daubed with French lavender, flecks of fresh snow, and trickles of chilled champagne.

It is when your spirit goes wandering upon the wind, That you, alone and unguarded, commit a wrong unto others and therefore unto yourself. And for that wrong committed must you knock and wait a while unheeded at the gate of the blessed. Like the ocean is your god-self; It remains for ever undefiled. And like the ether it lifts but the winged. Even like the sun is your god-self; It knows not the ways of the mole nor seeks it the holes of the serpent. But your god-self dwells not alone in your being. Much in you is still man, and much in you is not yet man, But a shapeless pigmy that walks asleep in the mist searching for its own awakening. And of the man in you would I now speak. For it is he and not your god-self nor the pigmy in the mist, that knows crime and the punishment of crime. Oftentimes have I heard you speak of one who commits a wrong as though he were not one of you, but a stranger unto you and an intruder upon your world. But I say that even as the holy and the righteous cannot rise beyond the highest which is in each one of you, So the wicked and the weak cannot fall lower than the lowest which is in you also. And as a single leaf turns not yellow but with the silent knowledge of the whole tree, So the wrong-doer cannot do wrong without the hidden will of you all. Like a procession you walk together towards your god-self. You are the way and the wayfarers. And when one of you falls down he falls for those behind him, a caution against the stumbling stone. Ay, and he falls for those ahead of him, who though faster and surer of foot, yet removed not the stumbling stone. And this also, though the word lie heavy upon your hearts: The murdered is not unaccountable for his own murder, And the robbed is not blameless in being robbed. The righteous is not innocent of the deeds of the wicked, And the white-handed is not clean in the doings of the felon. Yea, the guilty is oftentimes the victim of the injured, And still more often the condemned is the burden bearer for the guiltless and unblamed. You cannot separate the just from the unjust and the good from the wicked; For they stand together before the face of the sun even as the black thread and the white are woven together. And when the black thread breaks, the weaver shall look into the whole cloth, and he shall examine the loom also. If any of you would bring to judgment the unfaithful wife, Let him also weigh the heart of her husband in scales, and measure his soul with measurements. And let him who would lash the offender look unto the spirit of the offended. And if any of you would punish in the name of righteousness and lay the ax unto the evil tree, let him see to its roots; And verily he will find the roots of the good and the bad, the fruitful and the fruitless, all entwined together in the silent heart of the earth. And you judges who would be just, What judgment pronounce you upon him who though honest in the flesh yet is a thief in spirit? What penalty lay you upon him who slays in the flesh yet is himself slain in the spirit? And how prosecute you him who in action is a deceiver and an oppressor, Yet who also is aggrieved and outraged? And how shall you punish those whose remorse is already greater than their misdeeds? Is not remorse the justice which is administered by that very law which you would fain serve? Yet you cannot lay remorse upon the innocent nor lift it from the heart of the guilty. Unbidden shall it call in the night, that men may wake and gaze upon themselves. And you who would understand justice, how shall you unless you look upon all deeds in the fullness of light? Only then shall you know that the erect and the fallen are but one man standing in twilight between the night of his pigmy-self and the day of his god-self, And that the corner-stone of the temple is not higher than the lowest stone in its foundation. Unbidden shall it call in the night, that men may wake and gaze upon themselves: Oman frankincense, Peru balsam, cardamom, and smoked amber. The sales from February, March, and May’s scents from the Prophet series (On Giving, On Eating & Drinking, On Work, On Joy & Sorrow, On Buying and Selling, and On Crime and Punishment) benefit the ACLU because we are in desperate need of civil rights protections right now. The Take Action area of their website presents handy opportunities for speaking out against current and ongoing injustices, even if you only have a few minutes to spare.

This mostly smells like a cherry lollipop. It verges on cherry tootsiepop, but the cherry is not that dark -- it is lighter and brighter. The pink pepper in this is pretty subtle, and most like the pink pepper found in Red from the Fraggle Rock Line. It doesn't have a kick to it like it does in some blends, nor does it have a bubblegum-y quality to it like in High-Strung Daisies. I couldn't pick out anything ginger-y, and upon looking it up, I saw that white ginger is a flower -- but I'm not smelling anything floral here, either. I've tested this a few times and slathered it on as a scent of the day, and it always stayed close to my skin. I like this and will be hanging on to my decant, but I don't think I need a bottle. I just wish it had some more oomph!

Liqueur-soaked twin cherries reeling from a double pony-kick of pink pepper and white ginger.

Snake Oil and Candied Pomegranate.

Celestial drama. Radiant pomegranate crowned with golden amber and saffron, a waft of singed frankincense, and velvet black cherry. From a 13th century Manuscript of the Apocalypse

Each purchase of Gloomily, Gloomily comes with a 1/32 oz imp of the Donkey’s Tail. The Donkey’s Tail is not available for sale on its own, and make sure you keep it safe as you never know where it might end up. “That Accounts for a Good Deal,” said Eeyore gloomily. “It Explains Everything. No Wonder.” Doubles as a bell-pull: a beribboned strip of French lavender, bourbon vanilla, silver thistle, grey musk, pink silk, and well-loved grey cotton.

I haven't actually had this soda, or its namesake pie, so I can't compare it to the actual thing, but this smells like a fizzy, tropical (maybe pineapple-y?) soda with something clean beneath it (not sure if it is an aldehyde or a musk), as well as some graham cracker crust and some whipped cream. I really wish that clean aspect weren't present in this, because it's the most pie-like of the 2025 pie frimps since it actually has a discernable crust note (which smells delicious!). I'm still going to hang on to my frimp, though.

Disclaimer: this perfume oil is not blue, it is not combustible, and it is not caffeinated.

This is definitely stronger on the lemonade than the strawberry, and it's a very tart lemonade. I'd say that there's more sweetness to be found from the lemonade in Grumblotch’s Salts, even though that scent has a mineralic quality to it and some salt. I'm also not getting any pie crust from this. It gets sweeter and improves after it has been on the skin for several hours, but the scent is pretty faint by that point. Of the 2025 pie frimps, this was the one I enjoyed the least.

A burst of summer sun to treasure during the icy months ahead.

London Fog Cream Pie smells like Earl Grey, with its bergamot and tannic black tea leaves, swirled with frothy steamed milk and a dash of vanilla syrup -- which is to say, it smells like a London Fog! It gets a little buttery after several hours of wear on me, but not overly so -- although I suspect that's the cream part of the cream pie at play. I don't get anything overtly pie from this, though. This is my favorite of the 2025 pie frimps -- I only wish it lasted longer and were stronger!

A velvety, sophisticated concoction for the ages!

This is very strong on the matcha, which isn't the same as the Lab's regular, lemony green tea note, and it isn't too bitter or vegetal. The matcha smells very similar to the matcha notes used by Astrid Perfume and Nocturne Alchemy (for those who aren't as familiar with BPAL but have tried some other perfume houses). I don't really get any pie crust from this, and it takes several hours before a light vanilla emerges, which I suspect is the cream part of the cream pie. I really enjoy matcha scents and will be hanging onto my frimp, but I do wish I got more actual pie from this!

We're that relative who tries to make everyone try a green pie! This one dances lightly on the palate.

Streams of frozen amber, snow-dusted frankincense, birch bark, Peru balsam, and rivulets of smoldering beeswax. Gustav Lange

“Good morning, Eeyore,” said Pooh. “Good morning, Pooh Bear,” said Eeyore gloomily. “If it is a good morning,” he said. “Which I doubt,” said he. “Why, what’s the matter?” “Nothing, Pooh Bear, nothing. We can’t all, and some of us don’t. That’s all there is to it.” “Can’t all what?” said Pooh, rubbing his nose. “Gaiety. Song-and-dance. Here we go round the mulberry bush.” “Oh!” said Pooh. He thought for a long time, and then asked, “What mulberry bush is that?” “Bon-hommy,” went on Eeyore gloomily. “French word meaning bonhommy,” he explained. “I’m not complaining, but There It Is.” Every solid friend group has at least one goth kid representing. Soft grey musk, pink thistle, lavender ash, tea leaves, pale iris, grey lilac, and rain-soaked moss. Each purchase of Gloomily, Gloomily comes with a 1/32 oz imp of The Donkey’s Tail. The Donkey’s Tail is not available for sale on its own, and make sure you keep it safe as you never know where it might end up.

A row of plump, cardamom-spiced sweet buns overflowing with pooflets of lavender cream and almond paste.

Voluptuous Bulgarian rose unfurls like crimson silk, met by the dark, resinous warmth of freshly cracked coffee beans.

An ode to persistent typos and overconfident, profoundly incorrect autocorrect. Dedicated to Ali in gratitude for years upon years of undangling my participles. Proceeds from the sale of this scent benefit Philadelphia’s Childrens Literacy Initiative who helps provide Black and Latino children with high-quality and culturally sustaining literary education. 7-year aged patchouli, candied dates, and dried red currant.