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Well, this one was a surprise. Wet, I got metal, metal, and more metal. Bleah. Drydown? Still lots of metal with a bit of musk. Late drydown, say 5-6 hours in, my nose stumbled over my wrist again. What have we here?? OMFG, musk, musk, glorious muuuusk!!!!!!! *sings offkey and bangs BPAL cup* I would happily belly flop into a poolful of this and paddle around for the rest of my days :thud:

This went straight to soap on me. Bar soap. Cheap bar soap. Not fair

Remember when you were a little kid, and you got to stay overnight at Grandma and Grandpa's house? But sometimes you got a cold. Then Grandma would put that stuff on you. And it smelled just like this With notes like these, I don't know what ever made me think the frau and I could get along. Sometimes my optimism amazes even me.

One of my all time favorites is Glitter, the original version. It's lemon and heliotrope with a kick of musk, and dries down to a warm muskiness But it's hard to find. A couple years ago, suggestions were made - Feu Follet (tried it, don't think I liked it?) and Fae, which I think is kind of, um, pale? Any suggestions for a replacement?

I remember exactly when they were discontinued - it was the day I joined I definitely prefer 10 mls of my faves. They take up a little less space & that's especially convenient for the ones that need cellaring. I understand their reasons for d/c'ing the 10 mls, but the customer base has exploded since then, and I suspect they'd sell really well. I'd definitely buy a bunch

I finally scored a bit of this! In the Bottle: Big hit of lemon. My husband said lemon and "something else." Wet: Lemon overtaking everything. Drydown: The lemon softens and recedes into the background. The "something else" dusky comes out but I can't put my finger on it. Slightly musky-dusky and very delicate. Any florals are long gone from this blend (trust me, if they were here, my skin would have announced them). Within an hour, I have to put my nose practically on my wrist to smell anything at all. Really disappointing. June Gloom hasn't held up that well, but she's 4 years old. I wonder what that is in perfumer's years. . .

Mechanical Phoenix = distinctly metallic (fun but not wearable, IMO) Dead Man's Hand = dirt on me, but I think most people get leather? Pickled Imp = smells like your mother's spices spilled all over you

Phobos is the truest lemon I've ever tried So you might try layering it with something else?

Skin musk, smoky vanilla, pine pitch, patchouli, Indian resins, golden honey, and tobacco. Interviewer: Have a seat, Skin Chemistry. Ms., is it? Skin Chemistry: Yes. What is this about, exactly? I: Got your report on Illustrated Woman here. Headquarters has a few questions. Sure you won't mind answering 'em. *looks down at clipboard* SC: Is there some kind of problem? My work's always b-- I: I'm sure. Let's just get through these questions and you can be on your way. Says here you wrote "Early impressions of overwhelming pine and menthol." Are you aware that no one else in the company has noticed menthol? SC: Well, no, but I-- I: Are you always such a free spirit, Ms. Chemistry? SC: I'm sure I don't know what you mean! (indignantly) I: Uh huh. *flips papers* Next impression: "straight to menthol, with hints of patchouli and tobacco." Menthol again, Ms. C. *raises eyebrows expectantly* SC: Well, that's how it smelled to me. (nervously) I: Right. *makes notes* SC: What are you writing? I: It all goes in my report. Moving on. *refers to clipboard again* Nothing in your report about vanilla or honey. Care to explain? SC: I only report what's there. I: That's what they all say, lady. (bored) According to 96% of company employees, vanilla and honey are there and menthol isn't. But I'm just a company drone. Whadda I know? I'll write it up and send it back to HQ. SC: What'll happen to me? I: Like I said, lady, not up to me. I just investigate. But if I wuz you, I'd keep my nose clean. Har har.

Today we've got somethin' special for ya, folks, here at the BPAL Auditorium - mud wrestling! That's right - good clean, sloppy fun brought to you by our sponsors, Kebechet and Puddin. Let's give 'em a big round of applause! (holds up applause sign) First up is Faeu Boulanger! Getting in the ring are MG, Play Misty for Me, Deadly Violet, and Minty Fresh. It looks like we've got an unscheduled visitor right out of the bottle early in the round. Fruit? That's a real headscratcher. She's not even on the scorecard. Anyhoo, in no time at all, MG and Misty are sidelined. Looks like it's gonna be a matchup between Violet and Minty and what a match it is. Violet's got Minty in a nasty headlock, and it doesn't look good. Minty is turning a lovely shade of purple - now there's a role reversal (heh heh). And Minty is down for the count! She isn't moving. The ref is nudging her with his foot. Looks like she didn't make it. Oh, too bad. It's a clear victory for Deadly Violet. Keep your betting tickets, folks. Odds were 9-to-1.

"Lookit the cool bottle- Oy! Watch where you point that!" She jabbed the trident in my direction again, drifting easily in the current. "The riddle in the bottle. Answer it." "Rotting seaweed first?" I guessed. Her eyes narrowed. "No? Dead clams?" "How did your kind ever evolve?" She said scathingly, swimming several paces away. "Wait, resemblance to Black Lace in the end!" I shouted after her. "That's it, right?" Too late. All I saw was her silvery tail as she flipped into the slipstream and disappeared. "Can too evolve." I mumbled, as I sat on the seafloor stuffing my new bottle with unwilling shrimp. "I can twirl in circles better'n any ol' mermaid."

Me: Who's in there? Clove: Meee! Cinnamon: Me too! Me: Aren't there any more of you? Clove: Nope. (innocently) Cinnamon: But you're standing on Pi-mmph!! (gets sharp elbow to the ribs) Me: What about Vanilla? She's supposed to be in there too. She's definitely listed. Clove: Haven't seen her. (holding Vanilla under the surface in a headlock) Me: It's eerie how the other notes are missing. Clove: (smiling widely) Isn't it?

Lydia is jasmine, but not the sweet little Jasmine who crawls into bed with you in her cute li'l flowered nightie during a thunderstorm in the middle of the night cuz she's scared kind of Jasmine. Noooooo. This is great big ol' fat Mama Jasmine in the ugly housedress you hope to god she's never ever wearing out in public. This is 'Slap you upside the HEAD' Jasmine. "You listenin' to me, boy?" Whompp!! "I SAID I'm TALKIN' to you, BOY!" Whomp-whomp!! *hands on big ol' lumpy hips* THAT kind of jasmine. p.s. I detest jasmine. YMMV

Spiced rum, coconut, pineapple, and vanilla. In the Bottle: A little spice and some fruit, must be the pineapple. Wet: Mildly spicy fruit, not detecting the alcohol. Drydown: As it dries down, I'm not getting much fruit. There's a tetch of sourness from something, must be the pineapple? In the end, it's all spiced rum. No coconut, no vanilla. Not for me.

In the Bottle: Pretty! Almond and ?? Wet: Still almond - yay! I hope it lasts. Drydown: This has a bit of throw, for now anyway. It's starting to morph, the alcohol is coming out. The almond disappears. *sniffle* When all is said and done, I'm left with spicy alcohol, no fruit. Not exactly what I was hoping for

In the Bottle: Palm? It smells of dampness too. Wet: I'm getting a slight floral note. Drydown: The floral (the hibiscus) amps and takes over, bludgeoning the other notes into submission. I get a hint of soapiness too, which is unusual. This one is soo not a winner for me. Disclaimer: I can't wear florals at all, but I keep trying, thinking I'll find one where the floral plays nicely in the background. Maybe someday. ETA: I scrubbed my wrists 2 hours after I applied this, but the hibiscus is STILL going strong. Will have to try rubbing alcohol, or maybe steel wool. . .

In the Bottle: Sour. Old wood? Wet: Wet smoke? This one is really hard to describe. Drydown: I don't know firsthand what volcanic ash smells like, but I'll bet this is it. One of the strangest blends I've ever tried Perfect for, I don't know, Halloween, Day of the Dead parties, bonfires. . .

In the Bottle: Tropical fruit. Wet: Fruity with a booze note. Drydown: The fruit smells artificial on me, not like real fruit, and I can't pick out the individual fruit notes. I'm not getting any bubblegum out of it either. And to me, this is a much heavier scent than Fire Pig, which was so light and sparkling I cellared it, hoping it would acquire some depth (never did, BTW). Not a winner for me, but I'll definitely retest it.

In Bottle: The alcohol is strong! The fruit is a background player. Wet: The alcohol tames down quickly, and this becomes really pretty. What is that fruit?? Mmmm. Drydown: The alcohol comes and goes on me. An hour in, the scent is getting fainter, and an odd dusty note* appears. Two hours in, not much is left. I have to practically put my nose on my wrist. There's also a strange sharp note I can't identify. I had high hopes for this one that didn't pan out. I also did all my Tiki reviews cold (without reading notes first); now I see that the sharpness was probably from the lemongrass. * could be from leftover anaesthesia in my system - I noticed it when I test a couple of other blends, and I usually don't

In the bottle: Candied fruit Wet: Tropical fruit - yum! Drydown: A hint of alcohol comes out to join the fruit. After a while, maybe half an hour, it begins to smell like a tropical fruit bowl, and the alcohol scent is mostly gone. I stick my wrist under my son's nose, demanding he sniff it. He pronounces it "Weird." Hmm, not exactly what I was going for. This is the one that seemed most promising on first sniff, so I may cellar it for a few months to see what it does. I might try layering it with another blend too, just not sure what.

Wet: Murky, mossy. Wet: Yuck, what IS that floral?! It keeps getting stronger. Eep. Drydown: The floral just keeps taking over whatever else is in the blend, and I detest it. Only after I've written my review scribbles do I look at the notes. Aack - jasmine! No wonder. My nemesisss! So please read this review through my Anti-Floral Filter.

When I first got this, it was a failure, but now I've heard reports that aging has brought out the amber and musk, greatly improving it. So, with anticipation, I dig out my dusty bottle and try it again It still smells like I passed out on the floor of a wine bar and my friends just left me there, spilling drinks on me the rest of the night. More cellaring? Ah, no pun intended

In the bottle: Fabulous! Wet: Yummy, all vanilla, well almost all, plus a little of what must be the ginger blossom. Drydown: It's beautiful for a bit, almost all vanilla, which I LOVE, but then it acquires this weird dusty note. Bleah. And finally it goes generic on me with...ye gods, is that floral??! Aw, I had really high hopes for this one, too. Disclaimer: I may still have anaesthesia in my system, making my chemistry even wonkier than usual, so YMMV

In bottle/Wet: This is teasing me. It smells like something from my childhood, but I can't remember exactly what. On skin: Woody with something faintly sour in the background. Eek. This doesn't bode well. Drydown: Sigh. Didn't improve much. The woodiness was obviously the ironwood bark, but to my nose it was more like pencil shavings. That sourness just never went away. Definitely not a winner for me. (My chemistry could be even wonkier than usual because I've still got remnants of anaesthesia in my system - YMMV)

The epitome of an earthy/dirt scent. I put it on and put my wrist up to my DH's nose. "Here, smell this," I demanded. The poor, unsuspecting guy did. "It smells like must!" He wrinkled his nose. I laughed in delight. Sheer genius! I wouldn't wear it, of course. I mean, when would a person want to smell musty? Well, maybe on Halloween. . .