A Paean to Rogue Rangers, some Alternate Facts, and a Fire Cock

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Three new scents are live at Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab!

ALTERNATIVE FACTS

The truth hurts — so why tell it? Muffle the blow with Alternative Facts.

For example:

FACT: Following White House advisor Kellyanne Conway’s January 22 appearance on “Meet The Press,” sales of George Orwell’s 1984 skyrocketed, making it the fifth-best selling book on Amazon.com.

ALTERNATIVE FACT: In under a week, President Trump’s administration has already managed to improve literacy, reflecting the public’s renewed interest in privatized education, as well as its rejection of the mainstream media in favor of more “traditional” forms of information-gathering.

See how easy that is? With the help of Alternative Facts, even the most unpalatable among us can preside over a gallery of glittering, candy-coated delusions — one in which reality itself conforms to our beliefs, sincerely-held or otherwise.

ALTERNATIVE FACTS

If you truly want to obfuscate what you really smell like, this is the scent for you! Sugar-crusted vanilla, a firecracker-blast of cherry and sour lemon, a hint of scuttling spiders, encroaching fog, and trumpets of bombast, bluff, and bluster.

Like its companion scent, Fake News, proceeds from Alternative Facts will benefit the ACLU.

Trivia: I composed the scent concept and description for Alternative Facts while in line to view the Constitution at the National Archive. It was a fascinating experience: the line to view the documents in the Rotunda was filled with MAGA hats /and/ Pussy hats, and it really dawned on me in that moment that we're all looking at the same sacred American artifacts, but reading, interpreting, and responding to them in entirely - often diametrically opposed - ways. What I saw when I bore witness to the Bill of Rights isn't the same as what the guy next to me in the Trump scarf saw. The whole experience filled me with this strange frisson; it's hard to put into words. It was like witnessing a pantomime of the vast, vast differences in worldview in this country come to life.

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In response to the National Park Service retweeting a New York Times piece on Trump’s Inauguration numbers, Trump’s fragile ego demanded that his administration order the NPS to stop all tweets.

The National Park Service refuses to be muzzled. On January 24th, South Dakota’s Badlands National Park social media team defiantly posted a series of climate change facts from the National Wildlife Federation before being shut down. Since then, anonymous employees from the National Park Service started a rogue twitter account:

https://twitter.com/AltNatParkSer

These courageous federal employees are risking their careers to ensure that the public is kept informed on issues of climate change. They are fighting for transparency, truth, and science, and they deserve every ounce of support we can offer them. Tweet, email, FB, and phone in your support. Visit your local National Parks and thank the employees there in person. Donate to the National Parks Conservation Association and the National Park Foundation.

For them, for us, for the sake of the First Amendment, the environment, our state parks, and our future, we honor the bravery and chutzpah of these NPS employees with a scent that benefits the National Parks Conservation Association and the National Park Foundation.

THEOI NOMIOI

The Theoi Nomioi are the gods and spirits of the wild: the countryside, the pastures, the forests. Under their auspices, untamed nature thrives, the beasts of the wild feast and multiply, the mountains reach to the heavens with their stony, snow-capped fingers, and the forests grow thick and dark with mystery.

The National Parks Conservation Association

“Since 1919, the National Parks Conservation Association has been the leading voice of the American people in the fight to safeguard the scenic beauty, wildlife, and historic and cultural treasures of the largest and most diverse park system in the world. Help us assure the future of our beloved national parks.”

The National Park Foundation

“The National Park Foundation protects America’s special places, connects people to nature and inspires the next generation of park stewards.”

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FIRE COCK

A new year’s blessing! Peony, China’s national flower, with bamboo for flexibility, plum blossom for perseverance, courage, and hope, tangerine for wealth, orange for happiness, lychee for household peace, pine resin for constancy, golden kumquat for prosperity, King mandarin for good fortune, cypress for longevity, sticky rice cakes for abundance and hopes for a rich, sweet life, and a splash of blazing red of dragon’s blood to help you scare away the rampaging Nian.

Artwork by Aristotle C Pramagioulis!